Fearing failure can be an enormous barrier in the way of fitness and weight loss success
Often resulting in self-sabotaging behaviour which can really hold you back.
Sometimes it is very apparent. At other times you may fear failure (and be protecting yourself from this) but not consciously KNOW what you are doing. Both situations can be very frustrating especially when they stop you from being who you want to be – even who you deserve to be.
I want to show you how to recognise, and then how to beat the fear of failure. This will give you the best chance of fitness success.
So why do we fear failure?
This is something that, to be honest, I am confused about – on one hand it makes perfect sense to be afraid of failing but then on the other hand if this attitude was applied to all of life then hardly anything would get done.
Imagine if no one took their driving test until they were absolutely certain they would pass – I guess there would be quite a few people out there without a full drivers license. And sports – imagine a basketball team who only played the games they knew they would win? They would probably never play a game as they would never have practised their skills in a real competition environment.
Its just not practical to avoid all situations where failure is an option. Failure is part of the process of learning and growing, in all areas of life and for all
people.I have written previously about not giving up and how failure is actually a good thing which is taking you closer to success. If you feel like you have failed at something th
en re-adjusting your mindset in this way is an important step on the journey to achieving your fitness goals.
Some say that it is not failure that we fear, rather we fear success
This is an interesting theory and one that I am sure is the case for a lot of people. Sometimes what we really fear is the unknown consequences of our success.
If you don’t know what will happen when you have achieved your goals (for example once you have the body you have always dreamed of) then it can be a very scary prospect. Maybe people will treat you differently, maybe they will think that you look down on them, maybe they will have nothing in common with you anymore or won’t like your new habits and lifestyle?
But…… If we fear success then why does it feel like we fear failure?
These thoughts all result in the same self-sabotaging actions, such as not sticking to your healthy eating plan or missing workouts and gym sessions.If you try to analyse why you can’t stick to a fitness program it is often not easy to acknowledge that you are afraid of success because often we are so unsure of ourselves.In the end it doesn’t really matter WHAT is holding you back – what matters is that you find a way past it.
So, How can the fear be beaten?
In the end it is all just fear, and in order to be successful you need to get over all feelings of fear and self doubt. They may not completely disappear but you DO have to find ways to deal with them otherwise they will constantly hold you back.You deserve to be the very best version of you, so you really owe it to yourself to conquer your fear.
4 easy steps to conquer the fear
1. Acknowledge the fear
Just like in the AA when the alcoholic first has to admit that they have a problem, the first step to overcoming fear is to acknowledge that it is there.Recognise that you have been stopping yourself from reaching your goals.
2. Work out WHY you have been stopping yourself.
We are all able to control our actions and so when we do something like miss a workout, there is very often an underlying fear which has caused this to happen.If you are able to spot this and understand your actions then you are already closer to reaching your goals and having the success that you really want.
3. Work out what is the worst that can happen, and how to deal with that
Now that you are aware of what you are doing you need to play a game with yourself to have the best chance of succeeding.You need to imagine what really is the worst outcome? What would be the very worst failure that you can think of?Now simply decide what you would do if this were actually to happen (you could even write this down so that you can be completely confident that you will know what to do)My guess is that this worst thing isn’t really that bad. Looking at it this way takes it out of your imagination and into reality, where you will see that you are stronger than you think. Which leads me swiftly on to the final step…..
4. Believe in yourself
This is probably the most important step in the 4 step process.Believing in yourself is a mindset more than anything and if you can trust yourself to do your best, to focus, and you know how to solve any problems then you should be able to slip into that mindset fairly easily.Of course believing in yourself is something that you will need to work at, its not something that we were all born with and everyone has to strengthen their own belief in themselves at times – even the pros like JNL or Tosca Reno!But… once you have spotted the fear, worked out what to do if it all went wrong and then committed to believing in yourself, then you are going to be well on your way to the fitness success that you deserve.You are also going to be better equipped to deal with any more self-sabotaging behaviour and feeling of failure that you may have again in the future (because believe me, it happens to everyone probably more often that you think!)Please let me know what you think, I love to hear all your comments and success stories